November 21, 2006

My pants, they are quite fancy.

Originally uploaded by Citizen Rob.
It's been three months of contract negotiations and working out all the tiny details, a lengthy process with any publisher but especially tricky with a large house like St. Martin's Press, with their in-house divisions for things like audio books and overseas editions.

(And merchandising and game rights, oddly enough, although both remain sadly blocked out of my agreement. That's too bad; I was looking forward to my action figure, and Schuyler's Monster for Playstation 3 would have been extreme.)

Today, I am holding the first tangible result of all my agent's hard work.

Friends, I have my contract. Eleven pages.

I'm sure I'll write more about this over at the book blog later tonight, but I just wanted to mention the moment here, with all of you. (Even the assmonkeys.) Many of you have been with me from the very beginning, back before Schuyler was even born, and I know a lot of your hearts broke when she was diagnosed, too. Every time she does something great, I can feel how much pride is out there, among people who will probably never even meet her. When she stumbles, I sense all the invisible hands reaching out to catch her.

Incidentally, there's not much to say about Schuyler at the moment. She's doing well in school, keeping up with all the jabbering mainstream kids in her class and getting excited about the holidays and her birthday. Perhaps it's tempting Fate by saying this (although really, by now it should be pretty clear that Fate can kiss my ass), but Schuyler may have entered a somewhat boring part of her life, at least until she takes a copy of the book to school sometime in the next year or two and uses it to smack some pretty blonde cheerleader in the head.

I'm taking her to The Nutcracker on Friday. There's your Schuyler news. I love classical music but have always been strangely cool towards ballet, so it'll be interesting to see who becomes a twitchy freak first, Schuyler or me.

Things are moving inexorably toward the day when Schuyler's life changes because of this book. It's impossible not to consider that, and we have. It was one of the first conversations Julie and I had about the book. We decided, and still believe, that the concerns (real and imagined) are outweighed by the potential benefits for Schuyler and all the other kids out there with their own particularly monsters, and even more so for other parents who find themselves in their own world of "WTF?" when their lives get turned upside down.

I've mentioned the monkey paw aspects of this book before, but today, I'm going to allow myself to set that aside and enjoy the moment. Just a moment, and then back to the work of finishing the book, and the very real work of being Schuyler's father.

Today I'm going to enjoy looking at that last page of my contract, at the line with my signature on it, beside the word "Author". Today, I don't feel like a fraud when I read that word. And that, my friends, makes this a very, very good day.


Anonymous said...

grats, Rob & family. And Happy Thanksgiving, too.

Anonymous said...

Congratulations!! Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

Erin said...

Congratulatons! You deserve this day and may there be many more good days like this for you and Schuyler and Julie.

Charming said...

If any kid deserves a stretch of boring old being a kid road, it's Schuyler. That's great news.

Congrats on the contract and becoming all official-like. Happy Holidays!

Gaijin Mama said...

Congratulations! I look forward to reading the book!

Michelle O'Neil said...


Breathe it all in. : )

Denise said...

Congratulations Rob! You've worked very hard at your writing, and even harder at being the best Dad Schuyler could hope for. I can't wait to read the book when it comes out.

grandefille said...


With gravy on it.

Here's to a regular Rum-Hud life for all of you. With exponentially more wonderful and/or uneventful days than any other kind.


Slightly cranberry-flavored smooches from Tennessee from all les filles, grande et petit.

Bev Sykes said...

You're going to get cramps from all the copies of this book you're going to have to sign for all of us. What a wonderful thing just before Thanksgiving. Congratulations!

The Meyer Family said...

Having had plenty of time now to read through the legalese, do you feel comfortable with the whereas and wherefores which dictate the terms of your project?

Legally-binding paperwork always gives me the willies, as though a slight misunderstanding on my part will somehow lead to the loss of all my worldly possessions. And my brain freezes every time it attempts to make sense out of the lawyerly vernacular phraseology.

Congratulations, though, and best wishes on the (hopefully) first of many writing and (?) photographic projects to come.

How do you know I'm not Liddy Wales? said...

Oh, man, I'm jealous! You are a real live, contracted, soon-to-be-published book author! Woot!

Erin said...

So proud of you, kiddo! I feel kinda giddy remembering our till-4 a.m. conversation in the office of my old apartment that ended with me handing you a stack of books to go and get yourself published.

How was that almost two years ago?!?

Love to Julie and Schuyler!

Debbie Ridpath Ohi said...

Woohoo, congrats, Rob!!!!!!!!!!

I agree with Bev, get ready for those hand cramps.

But I'm still going to stubbornly hope to be able to buy a Rob action doll someday as well. :-)

Anonymous said...

Breaking out of lurkdom to send you a hearty congratulations and wishing you and yours a very happy Thanksgiving.

Anonymous said...

i'm very proud of you. i've been reading since you had the lemonator.

- erin in nevada

Anonymous said...

Congratulations, Rob! I can't wait to read it - and I'll actually buy it, not get it from the library or anything!
Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family.

Photoplasia said...

Sometimes, boring is good.

And congrats, my man - I may not have been here from the very beginning, but I do date pre-Schuyler - I've laughed and cried with you in these pages.

Way to go, Rob.

Anonymous said...

Fancy pants, indeed. Rock on!

Anonymous said...

Awesome! I am so proud of you guys! You did it! Now I wanna know when I can buy this! And Ill request that my library buy this! Congrats!
Shannon and Carey Best, Austin

Anonymous said...


I found your blog almost randomly, and am completely captivated by your daughter (and by your love for her). She's beautiful.

I don't know much about epilepsy at all, but if she develops seizures, would something like the ketogenic diet help? I met someone on an internet message board, for whom it worked wonderfully. Here's a link:

Peace to you and yours.