Along with the raincoat was a little matching umbrella. While she was mostly indifferent to the Amazing Technicolor World Domination Raincoat, Schuyler lost her mind over the umbrella. We got it for her, of course (because even without the raincoat on, I'm powerless over Schuyler's big anime eyes), and she walked around the mall with it like a dapper English country squire, albeit one who trips over her umbrella now and again.
Well, we made a mistake yesterday. We allowed her to take her umbrella to school, even though we knew better. She rides the bus to school, and then rides another bus after that to her after-school program until we go pick her up. If something doesn't fit inside her backpack, it tends to get left behind at some point. Sure enough, when we picked her up yesterday, she was sans umbrella.
I was pretty irritated with her when we got in the car, and she could tell. My friend Tracy once wrote of Schuyler that...
She worships her father. I don't know if Rob recognizes it as clearly as those of us outside can. Disappointing him causes Schuyler the greatest sadness you've ever seen. Eyes brimming, lip trembling, big shuddering sniffling sobs. It would be fully heart-breaking... if one had not just witnessed the particularly punk-ass behavior that got her in trouble in the first place.
I don't know if she worships me, but she doesn't like to disappoint, that's very true. I asked her shortly where her umbrella was, and she looked back at me with sad, sad eyes.
"Where is it, Schuyler?" I asked. "Is it at school?" Blank look. I sighed with frustration. "Tell me on your device, then. Where did you leave your umbrella?"
She pulled her Big Box of Words out of her bag and searched for a moment.
"Bus."
"You left it on the bus?" I said. She nodded, her lip sticking out just a bit.
I sat in silence as Julie drove. I heard Schuyler punching buttons on the BBoW. Then she hit the button to speak.
"Sorry."
I looked back at her, but she was searching for another word. She hit the speak button again.
"Sorry Daddy."
Did you hear that sound? That was my heart breaking in two.