When I examine all the interactions in my own life, it's with my daughter that I find myself developing the closest, most authentic, most real relationship. And it's one built not so much on words, which can be difficult for her, but largely on shared experience. It's important to me that much of that experience takes place in her world, sometimes internal and sometimes very much not, and on her terms. Knowing Schuyler means loving her without expectations of adherence to a societal narrative.
Authentic human relationships. Friendships without pity and lacking power imbalance. Unconditional love, not the kind you might feel for a beloved, well-tended pet, but the kind of love built on mutual fascination. The kind that comes from real listening. This is the path to real advocacy. This is the real work, the kind where changing the world mostly involves changing ourselves.
This piece was aimed primarily at the general public, rather than the disability community. (That choir hears my preachiness plenty enough already.) If it feels a little like the things I was writing earlier this summer, it's probably because this piece has been in HuffPo's queue for a few months. I'm really glad it finally ran, and I'm thankful to the folks there for publishing it.
