I found a disk full of archived material from like five years ago, and while going though some old emails, I just found a message I sent to my old notify list. And while I could try to put it in some sort of context for you, I actually think it reads better without it. Enjoy...
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To: Book of Rob Notify List
From: Rob Rummel-Hudson
Subject: Apology of sorts, and an explanation of sorts
Date: Fri, 27 Apr 2001
Hi, all.
Okay, so if you read my new entry before noon today, you probably saw a link to an interview with me. You might have even seen it soon enough to actually read the interview.
But chances are pretty good that at some point, the people who clicked on that link stopped going to an interview with me and were instead getting a page with a big penis on it.
And while there are many of you out there who no doubt find that both appropriate and just that a supposed interview with me would actually contain instead a big penis photo, there are doubtless many more of you who did not in fact expect or desire to see a big penis on your screen when you trusted me and clicked that link. And I suspect some of you were at work at the time. "Can you step into my office? We need to discuss the big penis on your PC..."
I just wanted to apologize to anyone who was offended by that big penis. I had no idea that between the time I posted that link and today, the site would, out of nowhere, disappear and be replaced with a big penis. I was not informed that the interview to which I had linked would in fact be replaced by a big penis.
I was only informed of the presence of the big penis at the other end of the link -- a link that my in-laws would follow (confession: that idea cracked me up a little), a link that my MOTHER would eventually click and say "Why, that is not an interview with my son, that is in fact a big hairy cock!" -- I was only told of it when my friend Joe (who, remember, likes to watch) wrote to tell me about the big penis.
I am annoyed. It was embarrassing and a little humiliating, fodder for jokes from all the chattering little assmonkeys who watch me and wait for me to stumble so they can go back to their unreadable little sites and write with stuttering glee about Rob and the Giant Penis. (That's a Dahl story, I believe.)
So my apologies to anyone who got an unexpected big penis on your screen. I'm not any happier about it than you.
It was not an attractive big penis, either.
-- rob
21 comments:
Well, how big was it?
It wasn't that big, I just liked saying "big penis" over and over again.
Although considering it wasn't supposed to be there at all, I'd say it was big enough for a hearty "Oh my!" from the average reader.
I'm sad I missed the big penis....
Big penises aside, can we assume from the photo that you got a new mac?
Aren't all big penises (penii?) attractive? Or would one classify them as "handsome"?
I wonder!
OK so maybe the big penis wasn't that funny back then -- but its freaken HILARIOUS now.
all these years of lerking and it takes a penis to make me leave a comment.
I love you...big penis or not.
I love you...big penis or not.
If I had a nickel for every time I'd heard that...
I mean, if you're at the stage of the game where you're looking at eachother's genitalia, you have to presume that you're going to think it's nice looking, even if it isn't, because you like the person to whom it belongs.
I have no idea why I can't stop thinking about penis. Thanks, pal!!!!
Dana, do you remember whose site that interview and subsequent penis were posted? Remember Jon-Jon?
HA! Yes!
Aren't penises GRAND????
Aren't penises GRAND????
I think that might have been the name of his journal, come to think of it.
In closing, I would just like to say PENIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(singing)
Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis?
Isn't it frightfully good to have a dong?
It's swell to have a stiffy
It's divine to own a dick
From the tiniest little tadger
To the world's biggest prick...
(Thank you, Monty Python.)
I don't get it - why would someone switch your interview with a picture of President Bush?
Hey, I remember Jon-Jon! He occupies the brain cell where quadratic equations should be. There are other old online journallers where my various PINs and passwords should be. (What's funny is that I thought of Jon-Jon, at the time, as a 'new wave' journaller, a Jon-Jon come lately - groan - if you will. Man, time flies.)
Anyway, I hope you care a lot less now about what those who are waiting for you to stumble really think.
Do you ah... do you still have the picture of the penis?
No, but dude, I can totally set you up.
For some reason reading "big penis" over and over made me laugh. I'm four.
I can't imagine how the blog search engines are going to react to this one. Actually, I CAN imagine.
Ultimately, with disappointment, I suspect.
that is so hillarious, and would only happen to a guy like you. i was smiling when you said the in-laws followed the link, and laughed out loud @ the thought of your mother.
your poor mother, she probably thought: hm...i don't remember little robbie looking like that in the bath tubbie!**
i wish i could've been a mouse in the corner when you discovered what had happened.
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