Schuyler is a lifelong commitment, but she's also like a warm star at the center of my solar system. When I get lost, I know where that center is. When I get disheartened, I know where to turn to for warmth. The complexity of parenting Schuyler is something I can't even describe; in ways both large and small, the reality of being Schuyler's father changes every day. It's work with no job description; it's building something large and complicated without a blueprint. It's making it up as I go. And yet without that work, I'd be a shadow of the person I am.
Your label "nowhere near Holland" made me laugh. When we first found that my son was deaf, an outreach person showed up (I'd phoned up everything with "deaf" in the listing in the phone book) and handed me that Holland pamphlet and burbled encouraging at me. It was not helpful in the least. Twenty-some years later I'm still mad. I suggest another label: Holland My Ass. There's not much worse when you have had a blow than a smiling automaton handing out platitudes.
Your label "nowhere near Holland" made me laugh. When we first found that my son was deaf, an outreach person showed up (I'd phoned up everything with "deaf" in the listing in the phone book) and handed me that Holland pamphlet and burbled encouraging at me. It was not helpful in the least. Twenty-some years later I'm still mad. I suggest another label: Holland My Ass. There's not much worse when you have had a blow than a smiling automaton handing out platitudes.
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