On Tuesday, the trade paperback version of my book comes out. On Thursday, I have an author event at a fancy venue, with good friends there. And the thing is, I am really very excited about it all. But at the same time it feels distant, like party sounds coming from the house next door. My focus, borne out of five and a half years of vague anxiety suddenly made real, is aimed like a laser on tomorrow.
Tomorrow's the day. Tonight, Schuyler and I will stay up all night watching scary monster movies. (If you saw the lineup, you'd either be jealous or you'd call Child Services.) Tomorrow, a neurologist will glue sensors to her pretty head and attempt to flush out her monster.
I'm not asking for your prayers, because you know how I feel about your God and what he's done to my child. But I hope you'll think good thoughts for us and send whatever positive energy you can in Schuyler's direction. Could that represent the same thing? Perhaps. All I know is that we need answers, once again.
I wanted to take a photo of Schuyler for this entry, so I went in her room and asked her to grab her favorite monster. She picked this guy, a gift from my editor at St. Martin's. As I took photo after photo, she began explaining to me about tomorrow, about what they were going to do, and why. I was really surprised to see that she was processing this EEG and the reasons behind it; I've explained it to her, but I wasn't sure she got it until now.
Even more interesting to me was that Schuyler understood the connection between the monster in her lap and the one in her head. I get the sense that she loves them both, in her weird little way.
I've been through a few EEGs with foster kids over the years. Take her a hat or a headband or something to help her hair afterwards. In my experience, we've always left with a head full of goo. Sometimes we've waited to see the doctor after the EEG. If that's the case, she's not going to want to wait with her hair sticking up like the bride of Frakenstein...or maybe she will. ;-)
ReplyDeleteI will be thinking of you all tomorrow, and sending all my best.
ReplyDeleteWe have an appointment in the afternoon so that they can explain the results. It just occurred to me that I'm not exactly sure what we're going to do with the no doubt sleeping Schuyler during that meeting, because I know Julie and I both want to be there for it. Anyone have a Radio Flyer we can borrow?
ReplyDeleteHope tomorrow gives you guys some answers.
ReplyDeleteI for one will be radiating good thoughts your way.
ReplyDeleteRob: You've turned the week into such a positive. Best wishes to your family. Schuyler, you are such an incredible, mature, beautiful girl. Good luck tomorrow. I'm so happy you are so in-tune to who you are!
ReplyDeleteMy son, Evan, who had a birthday the same week as yours, and is Autistic, with the same "box of words" as yours, we both wish you lots of good things and well wishes tomorrow!!!! I love your book and your website. I'm beginning my first book this spring.
Nik, Niksdad and I will be sending positive thoughts your way. **If** Schuyler is having seizures, I hope they can capture it on tomorrow's EEG. We've had to do a couple of 24-hr/ambulatory one's...Pain in the butt!
ReplyDeleteFingers crossed for answers and good news.
You both are definitely in my thoughts.
ReplyDeleteGood luck keeping eachother awake!! ~~~~~Sending positive vibes for tomorrow~~~~~~~~
ReplyDeleteI will also be thinking of Schuyler and her mom and dad tomorrow. Hope it goes very well!
ReplyDeleteI will be thinking of all of you tomorrow. I hope that things go smoothly and that you find the EEG a constructive step along the way, whatever the answers are.
ReplyDeleteI am in line with you on how I feel about their God too. But I do believe in karma and my wife and I (both avid readers for several years now) will be sending positive vibes and hoping for the best for you, your wife and your little monster slayer.
ReplyDeleteHave fun with the monster movies tonight, and I'm sending good ju-ju your way for the tests tomorrow! Cyber hugs to my Blogger favorites :)
ReplyDeleteSending hope (and honestly prayers too) Schuyler's way. I hope the afternoon brings answers.
ReplyDeleteHave a little fun tonight!
We hope that all goes well tomorrow and that whatever news and information you get will be borne easy. Maybe not easy, but it will be borne. As my Italian father says, courragio and molto forta (bastardized spelling of "courage and much strength!).
ReplyDeleteI picked up this book a few weeks ago and just cracked it open today. I finished it in one sitting. Right after I read it I went to the blog and read a good chunk of that; I went to the website and flipped through some of the pictures for the book and it just added so much to what I had just read. I couldn't put it down-I wanted to find out what happened next. I'm not a parent or someone with any special interest in this specific monster but it was the picture of Schuyler on the cover of the book that made me go over and pick up this book and I'm sure glad I did. I hope you guys get the result your looking for tomorrow. Thanks for writing such an honest book!
ReplyDeleteR.
I will certainly send good energy your way. And Rob? Whatever it turns out to be- definitive, not definitive, a complete surprise- you will continue putting one foot after the other, and worshiping the little gal, and she will still be the minor rock star that she is. Laurie and Peter, Rose's parents
ReplyDeleteGood luck tomorrow. You three will be in my thoughts. Can't wait to say hello on Thursday!
ReplyDeleteRob -
ReplyDeleteI'm sending boatloads of positive vibes to Schuyler, you,and Julie.
I wish I could send you a Radio Flyer as well ;)
k2
P.S. - I think Green Monster Dude is very cute - not as cute as Schuyler of course, but cute.
You have nothing but good thoughts, vibes and energy heading south from the Great White North for you.
ReplyDeleteHaving lost both my parents at a relatively young age, I find that a little chat with them before something big never hurts.. I'm not big on God, but the spirits of my ancestors, loved ones gone before me, and other interested parties all seem to help me open up to getting the energy flowing well. I'm chatting with my late grandmother about Schuyler this evening.
ReplyDeleteHeres hoping your path is clear
-e-
I'm also all about positive vibes, not much for praying. I will send many Schuyler's way.
ReplyDeleteFingers crossed for you both. Will you have time for a nap, yourself, before the afternoon meeting?
ReplyDeleteUnless, of course, your brain goes into hyperdrive and processes things better on lack-of-sleep-and-mucho-caffeine? Better try for that nap -- I don't know what the combination of "lack of sleep & plenty of stress" will do to your blood glucose, but it can't be good!
Lots of love and luck to all three of you tomorrow.