Schuyler's best friend had a birthday party today.
I've mentioned Sara before, in reference to a photo their teacher took of the two of them sitting in class together, ignoring everyone else and giggling together as they engaged in secret girl talk, BBoW style. Sara is Schuyler's little girl crush, and together they are just heartbreakers, both for what they can't do and for what they can. Also, they're both going to be boykillers one day.
When we walked into the McDonald's Playland for the party, Schuyler and Sara squealed in delight when they saw each other and crashed into each other in a high-speed, full-contact hug. They played together the whole time, once again sort of subbing the rest of the girls, most of whom were neurotypical kids from Sara's Brownie troop.
I have to say, there's something endearing to me about the idea of two broken little girls being snobs to the other, non-disabled kids. If you don't talk with a box, you're not cool enough to run with them. Sorry, but that's just how they roll. Go play with your Bratz dolls instead.
The thing that I thought was the most touching was how Schuyler and Sara talk to each other. They weren't using their devices much at all, but rather spoke in their little Martian languages (which sound remarkably similar to each other) and in a sign language that they seem to have developed together out of ASL but have now made totally their own.
Schuyler has neurotypical friends, but those friendships never seem fair. It makes me crazy, watching good-natured Schuyler end up being someone's plaything because she can't easily talk, but it happens every time and I suppose it's inevitable. Two years ago, it would have seemed unthinkable that Schuyler would one day find a friend, let alone several friends, who live in this world but originate in hers. The Box Class has given her a peer group, and even considering all the good things she's gotten out of this program, that may be the one I value the most.
God, I'm going to miss that little girl next week.
As soon as I get back, Schuyler and I are going to Odessa to see my family and watch my best friend from high school perform as soloist with our old high school band. Manhattan to West Texas in a single day? The culture shock may very well kill me.
So beautiful that Schuyler has a best friend.
ReplyDeleteYour love for her rings though in every post, but I gotta take issue with the word "broken." That little girl has something to say and her silence is what intrigues people to actually listen. You're just doing the incredible work of paving the way for her.
She's perfect! Wise! Whole!
Wait...amd I talking about Schuyler or Riley? Am I talking to you or me? Ha!
That's so awesome that Schuyler has a best friend who will probably understand her more than anyone else would. My best friend and I grew up together as the only deaf students in our public school. We were totally wrapped into our own world, using ASL, which no one else knew. We are still the very best of friends today. =)
ReplyDeleteI've written in the past about my use of the word "broken" and other words not necessarily out of the Holland essay. I'm leaving for the airport in an hour, otherwise I'd search them out for you. I'll try to find it later, though.
ReplyDeleteI found it. The tone is a little snotty, since I was responding to someone in kind, but the sentiment is probably accurate.
ReplyDeleteWhen I have more time, perhaps I should reprint it here, especially since Darn Tootin' is almost certainly going to go away very soon.
Okay, leaving for the airport now...
All I can say is.... YAY! :)
ReplyDeleteYikes! Our first (sniff, sniff) tiff?
ReplyDeleteSeriously though, it was stupid of me to presume you hadn't considered the use the word.
My apologies.
Have a great trip!
Not a tiff at all. Every special needs parent approaches this stuff in our own way. (For the record, I also hate that term "special needs", which sounds way too Hallmark for me, but it's hard to get around using it.)
ReplyDeleteA best friend ranks as one of the few people in life you remember forever. And I say that having worked around the very elderly for many years. Most of them, if you find time to talk to them, can still tell you names and details of that first, best friend. I am so happy for Schuyler!!
ReplyDeleteWhat a great story to start my day.
ReplyDeleteHave a great trip!
Shannon and Carey
Loved this entry. :)
ReplyDeleteSince it was brought up, I gotta say I agree about the "broken" term... not because it's ever bugged me, I agree with your posts about using it, but because I don't really see how it applys anymore. Maybe it's just cause I'm out here in internet-land, shielded from the harsh reality, but when I look at your photos of Schuyler now, all I see a perfect little girl with a funky way of talking. :)
That is awesome that Schuyler has a best friend and they have their own language. That just makes me want to cry it is so sweet!
ReplyDeleteI understand that, and I'm glad she puts off such an unbroken image, because she'll need that more than ever in a few years. But her reality is the same as ever, unfortunately.
ReplyDeleteI'm reading your book, and i just got to that part. I immediately went to you blog to see if i could found that picture the teacher took. I love the way you write, makes me imagine everything. Its so good seeing Schuylers so big and pretty!
ReplyDelete