What does appendicitis feel like, anyway?
Yeah, this isn't how I wanted to start the day. Well, it also feels like gas, so we'll see. Perhaps I just need to, you know, play a little pants tuba.
I'll let you know. Without a lot of detail, because I love love love you all.
Ow.
Other thing I noticed when I had it was major loss of appetite. I don't mean "meh, not hungry." More like "why would anyone ever bother with food, ever?"
ReplyDeleteOther things - sudden onset, pain has moved to the right side, and pain changes based on your position. IE, can't pull your legs in to your chest. Most people do puke, but I never did.
Hope you're ok!
Well, it's not geting worse that I can tell, although it's not really getting better either. Well, maybe a little. It's not a sharp pain or all that bad, either.
ReplyDeleteAny lack of hunger might be masked by the Phentermine I'm taking. And fever? I'm at work, in the building with the broken AC. I've had a fever all week.
The pain is located in exactly the right spot, but it feels like it might be moving slightly. People keep telling me that if it was appendicitis, I'd be in agony, and getting sick too, so I am cautiously optimistic that I am simply a man waiting for a toot.
I am a classy fellow, aren't I?
"playing pants tuba" is the best fart euphemism ever. You nearly made me snort oatmeal out my nose.
ReplyDeleteAnd I hope you feel better soon. Preferably without having to have internal organs removed.
I had my appendix out 6 years ago. I thought it was just my ulcer for the first few hours, felt a little lousy with a lot of acidy stomach pain. Later I just felt really unwell as if I was coming down with the flu and then later I had some more serious stomach pain (which is when my husband dragged me to the ER). I never ran a fever and I never threw up and it took forever for the pain to actually be over my appendix. Which might be the last thing you want to hear!
ReplyDeleteRebound pain is a clear sign of appendicitis, so as Angie said if it hurts more when you let go, get to a Doctor. They have children jump up and down to check theirs, apparently they'll only jump once with an inflamed appendix.
I hope everything is ok!
Gawd you guys are a hoot!
ReplyDelete"Air Biscuit" and "Pants Tuba". Heh.
Hope you feel better, Rob.
My husband had his appendix out a month ago and I think the jump test, as mentioned above, is a good place to start. Good luck with this one, Rob.
ReplyDeleteOkay, I just stood up at my desk and jumped. It didn't hurt any more or less than it already does, so I'm thinking my appendix is in fact NOT about to explode.
ReplyDeleteI heard the only way to really check was to stand up from your desk, jump up & down repeatedly while yelling "I'm a princess!! I'm a princess!" and flapping your arms.
ReplyDeletePlease keep us posted on the results.
Mark G.
Like I don't do that already...
ReplyDeleteWeighing in on the "maybe it's gas" check --
ReplyDeletewell, you could try treating it as if it were gas, and if there's no change, then you'll know it's something else; one thing that can help pass gas quickly is plain peppermint tea. No milk, no sugar, just the peppermint leaves steeped. Peppermint is really good at alleviating gas, and also works within an hour; plus, it also doesn't taste like ass. (Another bonus is, the menthol in peppermint has a cooling affect, which is a very attractive proposition in summer. You can pour it over ice after steeping it, if hot tea sounds like a terrible idea now.)
The only time I had abdominal pain that *wasn't* gas, it involved a particular organ that a human male would *not* have, so any other help I can offer would only be theoretical. If *Julie* were having abdominal pain, I'd have other advice at this point.
A doctor friend of mine and I were just discussing this issue last week. She told me, much to my surprise, that you can have appendicities without acute pain in the lower right quadrant of the abdomen, without a noticeable fever, without an elevated white blood cell count (!), without nausea or vomiting . . . basically, she said, the only way to rule out appendicitis for sure is to do an ultrasound. Which isn't to say that you do have appendicitis Rob, just, if you're not feeling better, yeah, you have to go get that looked at. -victoria
ReplyDeleteI think appendicitis is like a flat tire---sometimes, you're driving on a crappily surfaced road and you think: Do I have a flat tire? And your friend, the sympathetic nervous system, kicks in and you become convinced that you MUST have a flat tire, because life as you know it will more or less end if you do have a flat tire.
ReplyDeleteThen, one day, you really DO have a flat tire, and you wonder how you could have ever wondered if you have a flat tire, because having a flat tire is an experience like nothing else.
So, given that you've turned the pain into a literary exercise for us all, it's probably NOT appendicitis.
However, referred kidney pain is not off the wall, and I seem to recall one of your fun-filled adventures with beedies medication was kidney problems. A call to Dr. Hottie is in order.
I, like the rest of the faithful, will perform the appropriate rituals likely to yield an outcome of flatulence, though.
I was going to say gallbladder, too, Kate. My husband said it was very like gas, too, and then it just got worse and worse.
ReplyDeleteSince you are at work, this might not be the best advice....but if you get on all fours and wiggle; it opens up more room in your abdomen for your intestines and the trapped gas is free to get where it needs to go.
ReplyDeleteLike I'm too proud to do that at work...
ReplyDeleteI must really be a very evil Republican, because I'm laughing my ass off reading the comments.
ReplyDeleteI feel terrible about it. I swear I'm not laughing at someone's suffering, especially someone with the luck of the Rob. I'm laughing at some of the mental pictures this thread is creating.
Rob doesn't deserve this gas or appendix or whatever it is even though he is pretty liberal. As a liberal, he's mostly harmless, it's not like he's Hillary.
Please Rob, as much I enjoy comedy, have this checked as soon as you can. Laughter and tears aren't that far apart.
"I must really be a very evil Republican..."
ReplyDeleteOh Jim, you know you're my favorite evil Republican, especially now that Bob Dornan went back to Mars.
My money is on "alien in your colon". If storm troopers burst into your office right as a little green man rips his way through your epiduris, it is probably an alien. You might want to get a CAT scan, though.
ReplyDeleteI once had a pretend appendicitis. I was rushed to hospital with a weird stabby stomach pain and a lot of pukage. The thing was that once I'd been put into a bed and given a bit of the old gas and air, I realised that I felt fine.
ReplyDeleteNot wanting to cause a fuss, I chatted with the doctor as he prepared me for my unecessary operation, he gave me an unnecessary anaesthetic and woke up 20 (!!) hours later minus one organ.
I really must speak up more.
I have GOT to say that this is the BEST comments stream ever. I'm so glad I'm the only one in the office because I would have to tell everyone why i'm laughing and I don't know if i could say the words "pants tuba" out loud without losing it and falling over sideways laughing.
ReplyDeleteall joking aside -- rob, see a doc if this doesn't go away with some regular old OTC gas alleviation meds or the peppermint tea suggestion.
we don't need a dead tootin.
My appendicitis was never horribly painful. I was tipped off by the rebound pain, and the fact that my stomach flu was getting worse rather than better after 24 hours. (I also never threw up, just spent a day thinking that I'd probably feel better if I did.) If you have rebound pain, I'd get it checked out. If it still hurts tomorrow, I'd get it checked out regardless because "not appendicitis" is not the same as "nothing to worry about at all, to heck with the doctor."
ReplyDeleteIf you decide you really think it's appendicitis, and have a choice of hospitals, you might call around and ask if they do their appendectomies laprascopically. Apparently these days you can have them done practically as outpatient surgery, but only about 50% of hospitals do them that way. The others do the traditional three-inch incision that has you laid up in the hospital for 3-5 days.
Q; You have a worrying abdominal pain. Do you
ReplyDeleteA) See if it goes away after a good fart?
B) Go to your doctor, just in case? Then fart.
C) Ask the internet , jump up and down, while drinking peppermint tea, and prodding your abdomen strategically, and then fart?